Making a list

Life is starting to get back to my 'new' state of normal around here. I was sick for about 3 weeks and then with the move and added stress I had a hard time getting myself well. I think I am just about there though.

Zoe and I are settling into apartment life well. She is a good dog for an apartment because she is quiet and friendly. Here she doesn't have to be cooped up in one room and she can roam anywhere she wants. We have even met some neighborhood dogs and she did quite well.

In the time that Josh and I have been apart, God has been dealing with us both in different ways. I am, whether intentionally or unintentionally, making a list of qualities that my next 'suitor' will have to exemplify before he gets the time of day. Now I don't say that to get a shock because I don't believe that divorce is ever God's plan. Once Josh is in a better place and I am in a better place several months down the road we will explore whether our marriage is something we want to salvage and if we can salvage it. If so then, he already knows that many, many months will spent in counseling. However in the mean time I don't think it is inappropriate to begin a mental list of qualities that I will demand from him or some other person. In 3 short years of marriage I have learned a lot about how a man and wife should treat one another and how easy it is to lose focus on keeping God in the center. So however short it may be, here are the things I am looking for:

1. Above anything else, I want a Godly man who will serve as the leader of the household because he has been called to do that. To love me as Christ loves the church. He will be the not only the family leader, but the spiritual leader.

2. I want a husband who will pray with me. I need that in a man and I won't settle for less. A man who turns to God for major and minor decisions. A man who knows that Jesus is in control and seeks His guidance everyday and encourages me to do the same.

3. A man who shares the responsibilities of keeping up a house without having to be asked. I don't want to be the maid, the chief cook, the chief clothes washer, the financial planner, you get the idea. I want help and equality.

4. A family man. I so desperately want to be a mother one day that if whoever this person may be doesn't want to have children, then they are the person for me.

I think that is enough for now. I in no way write these things to point out and lay blame on Josh as a husband. We both did what we thought a husband and wife should do. I think he would agree that we both have faults and if there is a next time around, things will be different.

Once I get my memory card emptied I will post pictures of my new place. I hope this finds you all well. =)